Wednesday, August 29, 2012

after a long absence, i am finally back!


I don't even know where to start--the past several months have been a total blur...especially the month of May. Usually May is such a magical month-the flowers start coming alive, especially my birthday flower, the lovely iris, and spring is in full bloom. It just so happens to be my birthday month too so of course it feels extra special to me.

This May was not the most memorable month, unfortunately, I lost two grandmothers on the same day-May 15th. Brad's grandmother whom everyone called "Garcy" and my grandmother whom everyone called "Grandma"...she was Grandma Carta to me both left this Earth. I won't go into details leading up to their deaths, because that just takes me back on an emotional roller coaster but my world certainly feels emptier without their rich presence in my life and I am still learning how to move on every day without them.

I have had two different reactions to their passings, although the ache I feel in my heart from missing them feels very strong. I know an era in my life has come to a close as two very important and influential women in my life have left me and now I am left with loving memories & their huge legacies. Surprisingly, both women were 92 years old, however, they were living very different ways of life right up until their last day. My Grandmother was living in an assisted care home and was slowing running down after losing her husband a few years ago. Her other half, someone she had been with for most of her lifetime, so living without him just wasn't the same. Grandma Carta was one of the snazziest dressers I knew, she shared my great passion for jewelry-we both have quite a collection, and I spent a lot of time with her watching her cook in her farmhouse style kitchen, enjoying her "special chicken" for tailgates, her famous pies, listening to her childhood in Detroit Michigan, taking adventures with her and Granddad, and had the privilege of having her attend sports games and momentous milestones in my life like my high school graduation, and fill her in on my move from my childhood home of CT to DC to CA. She has always been along for my journey through life. I was her first granddaughter, she never had a girl but had always wanted one so when I came along we formed a deep bond and her constant love helped to nurture me and shape me into the woman I am today. As much as I miss her dearly every day, I feel happy that she is now with my grandfather, together, forever and ever in heaven. Tell Granddad, his Tinkerbell misses you both but will never forget the legacy you instilled in me and the Carta family.

Losing Garcy felt more like a large shock at first just because Garcy was in wonderful physical and mental shape before she passed on the 15th. Heck, she washed her own car in her Californian driveway at the young age of 92, went to Costco to haul large purchases home in order to feed and take care of her large family, that was constantly popping in on her. Garcy said those three little words, "i love you" from the beginning of when Brad and I first started dating and accepted me into the family when I was still just Brad's girlfriend. She was sharp, always reading an array of books, cooking up her signature dishes for her family or out in her greatly loved and cared for garden which was always full of the most gorgeous collection of peach, rose, red, purple, white roses, succulents and other creatures of the Earth. She was a very unique person for many reasons but something she really helped me with was our move here to California. Garcy would call me every week just to say hello and check in on me and loved our frequent visits to her home in the valley, Los Banos. She was my rock and again made me feel right at home with her kind words, big hugs and constant support. I miss her every single day but am so grateful for her love and her most recent gift, comforting me through a life-changing event-our move. Thank you Garcy, for all that you did for me, both big and small.
Grandma Carta 
Garcy, my hubby's Grandmother

I'll never forget you both. All of my love~

No comments:

Post a Comment